Just been dumped!
In a world of change and fast pace we tend to get carried away with it waves and oceans on a daily basis, before long you look back to check how far away you sailed, only to find you are in uncharted waters.As we humans tend to be the best habitants of this earth of ours, and also have the ability to change like chameleons to match our surroundings, we can manage. if you slow down a bit and look around you and above you and under you, you can see what you missed on your fast pace run to nowhere.
We have this tendency to be harsh on our self, we behave in a socially acceptable manner which is not exactly what we want, except for the fantastic few. This group of people have learnt at an early age to make tough decisions, to take risks, to handle their choices with utter bravery. If I was to categorize myself I would pretty much say I belong to the wanderer risk taker, accept no bull person.
But I, like many others, have many defaults and mistakes, I have also taken forever to reach such relief and total control of what I want in my life. You too have this embedded in you somewhere depending on your upbringing and reading and teachings, you just have to dig for it and make it surface.This is not a joking matter, it is dead serious. Everyday you hear gossip and talk about so & so, everyday you pretend that you do not like gossip but lend an ear, and ask some questions.
What you are doing when you listen to gossip is basically check how better you are than the hero of this gossip session, she is the benchmark that you want to run away from. When you accept to be treated badly, you chose, when you are betrayed and stayed for the ride, you chose. When your gut feeling tells you something, and you refuse to listen to that FM station, you shut it off, and you are held accountable.
From my humble and small experience I can say that people fall into two categories, those who accept and live along, and those who refuse and live happy. People come in all flavors, different colors and looks, many scales of beauty, and in all sizes and two sexes. We cannot continue to say females are weaker, or men are aggressive apes, things have changed.
Here you have miss sunshine with Mr. Ego male, she knows he has his defaults that will end their relationship someday, but she accepts because he is the talk of the town. On the other corner you have Mr. perfect man with his drop dead gorgeous wife that only loves him for his bling and prestige, he to knows the end is close, but drags on his bitter winter days, all year long.
Both examples are real, they come in many mixes and combinations, in all civilizations and nations across the globe. I used to accept my relationships with all the hassles and baggage, emotional and garbage, and say it is my destiny. Then one day I woke up and said what does the other side look like like? Nothing was the same from that moment on. I tend to have this message hovering over my head that reads” My gain, your loss” You see I have control over my life now, not you anymore, you dragged me down, now I have to move on.
I make mistakes as I type, so imagine my life. I accept my rough mistakes and bury them with the daily dust we go through, with its good and bad moments. Over my two relationships( marriages) on a span of 15 years I can say this” you owe it to yourself to find tranquility, even if it means getting rid of your partners” tough talk, I know, but I did it. Many can argue with me, you were dumped, or I dumped the partner, I can assure you that I had a massive hand in it for it to happen. And after that my life was like a yo-yo, we all love yo-yo’s you know :-) then you get sick and slow down, but you are always happy.
When a girl or woman says get lost, I obey. You say in a cute way, what about love? I say love comes and goes, the good one comes when its least expected, who told you that the one you are in love with is the best thing for you?forever?and ever? check it out every once and a while for comfort and to make sure it is. So what do you do when a boy says its over, I don’t find myself in you? you accept and move on, no questions asked, like an original guarantee. You can call me heartless, I can defend my case till the last drop that I am full of heart and live in heart land. The only problem I face with the subject is how it is taken lightly and wrongly, and eventually given a bad rap.
To be happy you need to stay happy, day in, day out, for in the end its the totals that count. For instance if you have 360 days in the year and you are happy for 30 days in the year, sorry dear lovebird, you ain’t got a clue about happiness. Its when you can remember more laughs than fights, more excitement than fear, more joy than frowns, more hugs than slaps, that’s when you can say you are a happy go lucky individual.
Nothing deserves you more than you, so when you say good bye my love, I say hello stranger. No one should have control over your visions, dreams, happiness but you. You are the most special person in the world to you, if the other partner cannot see that, move on. When you combine two peoples lives you should have a stronger, more lovable, more powerful person made, not a stronger one and weaker lost other! I hate the people that suck the living daylight out of beautiful young souls and throw them bones to the dogs, then come back complaining that they are not up-to their standards.
Next time you call someone and say its over, you better mean it, it is not a joke, or game you can play. Letting go of a loved one is almost impossible, but please remember an important fact regarding this issue; Is she the one? is he the last lover? why did this happen? should I fix it or bust it? Should I pump more life into it? or let it dry & die? Is it worth my most valuable assets, my heart & life? or is it a liability that only seems to grow?
In the end its your call. Love is wonderful, love is magic in the making, love is the most talked and seeked feeling on earth, love can move mountains and create fresh water springs in our imagination that quench our love thirst, love makes the world go round, love ensures us of a better tomorrow, love mends and heals, love brings sweet tears to ones eyes, loves brings you to your knees willingly and happily, loves makes you smile unconditionally when you walk alone in your mind at night, love is the air we breath, without it I can imagine all of Solomon’s mines worthless, for who shall I give it to when I find it?
Just before I sign out, don’t forget to check your happy levels, and trust me on this one, you are the most precious person that ever lived, that needs to be loved unconditionally, and with no strings attached, and you can be very greedy, yes you can, you can have it all, leave nothing for the others, its all yours for the taking.
One condition though! if no one wants to be with you for whatever reason, do what I do, look the other way and move on. Its all good ;)
Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it’s better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together.
mamdooh.alradadi
“V” for Love! Free soul running
:)
I hope u don’t mind me saying this here,,,but I found the first two paragraphs rather confusing ..once i got through them and continued reading, however, this article shed some light on me. So I want to thank u for that ! :) It brought to my awareness some significant points. I found this particular line very powerful : “You see I have control over my life now, not you anymore, you dragged me down, now I have to move on.”
Also : “When you accept to be treated badly, you chose, when you are betrayed and stayed for the ride, you chose. When your gut feeling tells you something, and you refuse to listen to that FM station, you shut it off, and you are held accountable.”
Totally agree with this and beautifully said.
But I, also, think that hardships, trials and challenges,,,can bring two ppl closer sometimes. And for many ppl it does.
But overall, this article and the ultimate message I got from it, is wrapped up in this classic “happy” song by the late Jackie Wilson.
LOL ! I remembered this one time I heard it being played in a shop at the mall in L.A. I was 19. I cannot tell u how I find this song so irresistible! I started dancing,,,and “happiness” can be contagious that way,,,so ppl around me stared at first, then started dancing too! And the whole thing was recorded on their video monitoring cam. so the shop /brand actually used it in one of their earlier T.V commercials.
( I was cut off from it as per my X-husbands request )
Leaving with u a fun, happy song. Your writings and thoughts are truly inspiring! Don’t Stop. :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LMWqzHvSMvw