10 Do Not’s for better communication
We all seem to focus on the good in things today, and that’s a good sign. The issue is sometimes taken for granted by many folk. If you say you will do something and you don’t, and see something else you like to practice and you don’t, then you become worst that your original state.
So I will attempt today to show you what not to do, at least a few that will get you ahead of the many crowds surrounding you in 10 easy Do Not’s, remember Do Not!
- Do not look around a person when talking to them, do not look or take a sneaky glimpse at your watch, unless you want the meeting to end, or signal their time is up!
- Do not yawn, and if you do excuse yourself for doing so, and state why.
- Do not pretend to listen to what they are saying, if you already know the information being said, say so, and move on in the conversation.
- Do not keep repeating “ Yes, but!” “ I know, but” “ Listen to me” “ You don’t understand” take a moment and imagine someone is using those words with you in a conversation you are so excited about.
- Do not belittle people based upon misconceptions, rumors and stereo typing. I still fall into that trap, and I have been working on it for years. Here is the good news, the more I let my analysis guards down in conversations with new people, the more fascinated I become in the wonderful people that come in all sizes, ages, shapes & color.
- Do not wait for your time to talk. If you want to talk about yourself talk to yourself and save us the boredom and agony.
- Do not assume you are better than the talker, instead become interested in them, ask more, talk to them more about them! as they say “ be interested, not interesting”.
- Do not ignore cultures within cultures. Ask more and observe more, learn from your mistakes. There is a big difference between how Arabs communicate and Japanese. Even within your own country there lies many cultural ways and what’s normal in your part, could be a pure insult a few hundred kilometers south!
- Do not focus on the other persons defaults or scar, or balding spot, or black spot on his white shirt, or her smudged mascara… look them in the eye and focus on what’s being said, bodily and wordily.
- Do not interrupt people when they talk, and do not accept interruptions, respect is a requirement for free flow of ideas and great communication.
And one last one for the road:
- Do not be known as:
- a conversation hog
- a long meeting individual
- an Egoistic individual talking about your glory, let it speak for itself
- a me, me, me person
- a fake smile
- a gossiper, enjoy it every once in a while, but never be known for it
- a person that talks with food in his mouth, disgusting!
- a boring person, read more, examine more, investigate, understand, ask… you have to believe that people get bored with dull people you know, its true!
- a person that starts conversations with the same line every time i.e. “ here’s what I think!”
- an envy kind of person, everything they say they bought or did or managed makes your face turn blue, I know cause it shows! people read bodies, faces and words, remember that.
mamdooh.alradadi @ his home in Ramadan thinking of a better way in Jeddah, 18th August 2010
me@mamdoohlaradadi.com
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